Oral bac anglais - notion Idée de progrès

Bonjours,
est-ce que quelqu'un pourrait m'aider pour les fautes s'il vous plait ?
Merci pour vos réponses.
The notion I’m going to deal with is The idea of progress. The progress is a development or an advancement. To discuss this notion I choose to talk about India. In fact, it’s a country which is changing and progress rapidly . I fell India illustrates well the notion because it’s a country which is modernizing in spite of some old traditions and it’s why we can wonder « If today’s India is a real modern country »
Firstly we’re going to see that there is a lot of inequalities in India and then that India is modernizing.
We can say that india isn't a modern country because lot of discriminations and inequalities are persisting in this country. There is a huge inequality between man and woman. We can illustrated this with the help of the document «  The dowry tradition ». The dowry tradition represent a large inequality of the country. When India girls prepares to marry, their families have to gives a dowry (which is a kind of gift) to their future husband’s family as a compensation to the grooms parent’s for the cost of educating their son. If the dowry haven't had paid, the girl is subject to torture or sometimes even killed. Moreover we can take the example of the document «  Another girl » where we can see that girls are killed at birth in some part of India only because of their gender, this practice is named ''gendercide''.
There is also inequality between rich and poor in India. We can illustrate this thank to the document ''the Dalits'' witch talk about the cast system, a discriminatory tradition. In India the cast system divid the society into four hereditary social classes such as the Brahman or the Dalits which define your places in the society. When you are born in a cast you will die in it, almost impossible to climb up the social ladders in India. In addition 42% of the population in India live with less than 1$ a day.
Nevertheless, we can say that India is becoming a modern country because Indians mentality is changing. Even if the cast system persist in India, he is nowadays forbidden by the law. There is also judicial system which are set up in India to help bitten women in order to fight against conjugal violence.
On top of that, we can see that, not only Indians mentality are murdering but also the whole country .As we see in the document « Country on the march » we can see that the population is increasing, which represent 17,5% of the population and will overtake China by 2030. We can see an economic evolution too thank to the majors economics cities which are developing. We can see in the document « Hight tech cities » that there is a technologic revolution. High tech cities grow everywhere in the country. For example Bangalore looks like a science fiction experience. The country is on the march because the economy keeps transforming thanks to the rapid development of the high tech sector.
To conclude we can say this is evident that some inequalities still exist between men, women and citizens. However, India is a country with an economy who is currently changing and it’s why we can wonder if this economic revolution can may disapear the « old traditions » who creates inequalities.